You are viewing ojom

mojo's blog...stardate 23.9, rounded off to the nearest decimal point...

Recent Entries

You are viewing the most recent 25 entries.

30th September 2014

12:56pm: but...i drive a mustang
last night i got home from work and found this offer for an "upgrade" to my vehicle. according to the targeted marketing card, i could trade in my card toward a prius or rav4.

i think they have a very different idea about these cars than i do in order to call them an "upgrade"

2014-09-30 01.30.23

1st April 2014

7:24pm: happy bday to me, and april fools'!
yes, it's really my birthday. it was an interesting day in all, but i won't get into that.

i did, however, get a job interview set up for tomorrow. today she called me and did a phone screening. the she asked if i could come in for a face-to-face interview tomorrow. w00t! so after she scheduled it out, about an hour and a half later she cancelled it.

obviously an april fools' day joke. she got me!

11th March 2014

3:30pm: someone said he was "beyond help"
what i get from that is that he works at bed, bath, and beyond and that he is in charge of the "beyond" section

10th February 2014

2:33pm: georgia claims state of emergency
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/weather/georgia-prepares-heavily-south-expects-another-wintry-blow-n26236



all the food they eat is fried food. if that's not a state of emergency, i dunno what is!

7th February 2014

11:53am: btw happy new year!
new year, new home, new girlfriend...
11:52am: taliban claims to have captured military canine
http://www.foxnews.com/world/2014/02/06/taliban-captures-us-military-dog-report-says/


i got a visual of "military intelligence" being the ability to find numerous fire hydrants

26th October 2013

3:24pm: everyone claims to be weird
i guess that's normal

8th October 2013

11:44pm: spam subject: help your child with ADHD
me: why would i want to give my child ADHD?

2nd September 2013

1:36am: public marriage proposal gone bad
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytbsdUc-0BE&feature=youtu.be


maybe she was saying she doesn't like his head

28th August 2013

8:00pm: the secret to a long lasting marriage
is to argue daily, according to this article


the article says [they]"Have had 25,550 disagreements to date - that works out as one a day."

my ex and i had that many the first year. you'd think that we would have had a pretty solid relationship, but no...we're no longer together

21st August 2013

2:12pm: someone was asking about a contractor lien
i suggest that if there's time to lien, there's time to clean

5th June 2013

11:45pm: crimping cables for UPS must be confusing
normally it goes something like -

white green, green, white orange, blue, white blue, orange, white brown, brown

so of course i'm thinking for UPS it goes

white brown, brown, white brown, brown, white brown, brown, white brown, brown

28th May 2013

9:29am: BK employee foils robbery by stealing thieves' getaway car
thieves left car running

maybe they thought they had valet parking

21st May 2013

11:02am: white house press secretary getting grilled over scandals
i guess that makes him carney asada

20th May 2013

2:40pm: bronies
http://www.wired.com/underwire/2011/06/bronies-my-little-ponys/

i'm afraid just knowing they're out there

7th May 2013

10:38am: my messed up joke of the day
"hello, chuck? this is your cousin...amanda...amanda BERRY! you know that new sound you're looking for? well listen to this!"
"help! heeelllppp!"

linkage

6th May 2013

4:42pm: diners were fed rat, mink, and fox rather than lamb
link

turns out mary DIDN'T have a little lamb

7th April 2013

4:40pm: when elle from kill bill lost her remaining good eye
i wonder if she took the million dollars and went down to "eyes eyes eyes." i'm sure they could have fixed her right up

25th March 2013

10:25am: if you mess with the mob in the US you may end up sleeping with the fishes
pigs found dead in river http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-china-21766377

ducks found dead in river http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-china-21921145


in china, if you mess with the mob you may end up sleeping with the fishes. and pigs. and ducks.

9th March 2013

12:15pm: haiku, meet hulk-u
there's haiku, which we all know as the japanese poetry that starts with 5 syllables, followed by 7, and ending with another 5.

then there's hulk-u, which goes as follows:

hulk still tired
alarm clock go off
hulk smash!!!

28th February 2013

11:48am: point counterpoint with morrissey and mojo
morrissey: gay men would never kill anyone
mojo: michael alig
morrissey: *crickets*
Powered by LiveJournal.com